Profile Help – It's Not Me, It's You (Las Vegas)

It’s Not the Apps… It’s Your Profile

Is your profile not getting the matches you deserve? Getting too many of the matches you don’t? Or maybe you just know deep down that your bio is giving “please unmatch me immediately.

Send it in and let us help. We can give it a glow-up, tear it down (with love), or both. With your consent, we might even showcase it on stage so a room full of strangers can decide your romantic fate.

Tell us what to shout when we roast you. *

What's Your Email? (so we can drag you in writing too) *

When (if) we remember how Mailchimp works, do you want the tea about upcoming shows and disasters? *

Consent.... Because Consent Is Sexy.

I consent to having my submission used during the show, on social media, and/or in future “It’s Not Me, It’s You” content, recordings, and merchandise.

By submitting this form, I confirm that I am doing so of my own free will (and not under duress, thirst, or a post-breakup spiral). I grant full permission for my submission—edited, paraphrased, dramatized, or re-enacted—to be used publicly, worldwide, in perpetuity, and I understand this consent is irrevocable (aka I can’t change my mind later).

I affirm that I own the rights to everything I’m submitting, that it does not infringe on any third-party rights, and that I will not hold “It’s Not Me, It’s You” or its affiliates liable for any claims related to its use. Basically: don’t send us something you stole unless you’re cool with the original owner seeing it on a T-shirt.

I waive any right to compensation, royalties, or legal action (no matter how wildly successful this becomes). I also agree not to sue, because we are poor, and any profits will likely be used for alcohol (for research and reward purposes), therapy we won’t attend but fully support, and emotional support snacks.

This agreement is governed by the laws of the State of Nevada, because that’s where we live, love, and roast dating culture. *

Yes, this is binding, even if I one day become rich, famous, or run for office.

What Date Will You Be Attending? *

We Are All About Equal Opportunity Cringe Around Here. Which Chaos Have You Subjected Yourself To? *

What kind of help are you looking for? (Just FYI: we don’t have therapy licenses, relationship PhDs, or the patience of your last situationship — but we do have jokes, judgment, and questionable wisdom.) *

Paste Your Current Bio Here: *

Anything Else We Should Know About Your Dating Goals, Type, Or Dealbreakers? *

Upload your profile screenshots and/or photos: *

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